Hailey's Microdosing Journey

How microdosing psilocybin helped Hailey manage PMDD symptoms

** MICRODOSING HARM REDUCTION GUIDE for female biology.

At 26, Hailey was diagnosed with premenstrual dysphoric disorder, or PMDD. By 35, she’d tried several treatment options including birth control & SSRIs to manage symptoms. Birth control never worked for Hailey and seemed to make matters worse, so she went with SSRIs at first to see if they provided relief. After weaning her daughter from breastfeeding, however, her PMDD symptoms worsened and she struggled to find an effective treatment option. 

“After 4 years of being on an SSRI they want to keep adding more things to it, because when I weaned my daughter, I had horrible PMDD symptoms. I talked to PCPs, gynecologists, psychiatrists etc. and everyone just told me to talk to someone else. It’s so frustrating. They want me to add wellbutrin, they want to add this and that and I said I’m not adding another psychiatric medication, like I can’t do that and that’s when I started really looking into what my options were.”

Hailey’s decision to try microdosing psilocybin was in part because of her desperation to connect more with her children, become a better mother and stop the cycle of anger, rage and subsequent yelling at her children during the luteal phase. When she said that I felt as if she was speaking to my soul, because parenting with PMDD was extremely difficult, if not impossible, when my symptoms were at their worst. 

“With PMDD I am not able or capable of being the mother I want or need to be and it’s just the desperation for altering that. And I know I have a lot of “reparenting” myself to work on and stuff that I’m carrying with me and it just seems like it would be much more effective for me to work through that as opposed to what I think antidepressants do -  which is just kind of bury it and mask it.” 

Psychedelics are part of Hailey’s heritage and she’s always felt called to learn more about how they work. Hailey’s late grandfather did psychological research in the 1970’s at Harvard at the same time as the infamous Timothy Leary. A major player in the psychedelic counterculture of the 60s and 70s, Leary was a Harvard Professor, thought leader and psychedelic evangelist. Her grandmother, now 94, still shares stories about cooking dinner for Leary.

Side Note - I’m pretty much foaming at the mouth to get an interview with her grandmother! If you’re not subscribed yet, hit the subscribe button just in case I manage to pull that off.

“I’ve always felt like I wanted to learn more, in honor of my grandfather.”

Digging into the latest research on psilocybin, Hailey decided to try microdosing to see if it could help alleviate PMDD symptoms.  Because she’s still taking an SSRI, she did research on how microdosing may interact with her current treatment. 

She mentioned microdosing to her psychiatrist and was relieved when she was supportive of her decision. Psychiatry is rapidly advancing and as new research becomes available, psychiatrists are becoming increasingly aware of the benefits and risks associated with psychedelics. Some doctors are much more open to the idea than others depending upon background, knowledge and location. 

After learning more about microdosing, Hailey has been experimenting with different microdosing protocols to dial in what works best for her. Starting out, she tried a version of the Stamets Stack which typically includes a combination of lion’s mane mushrooms, psilocybin mushrooms and Vitamin B3 (Niacin). In Hailey’s case, she left out the Niacin to avoid the “flushing” effect and stuck with the psilocybin and lion’s mane.

The Stamets Stack, named after world renowned mycologist, Paul Stamets, is popular in the microdosing community. Stamets is arguably the most influential thought leader in the world of fungi. Dubbed the “Undisputed Magic Mushroom King” by Forbes magazine, Stamets recently had a new species of psilocybe mushroom named after him - Psilocybe Stametsii.

Stamets advocates for the potential of medicinal mushrooms to help with the many health problems we face today. Lion’s mane, a non-psychoactive mushroom, has a long history in China and Japan to help with overall health and longevity. In a double blind, placebo controlled trial conducted in Japan, research suggests Lion’s Mane mushrooms improved cognitive functioning in people with mild cognitive impairment. 

Niacin is typically added to the stack to help the body transport the compounds in the mushrooms and increase bioavailability. Lion’s Mane is believed to support psilocybin’s ability to help with the creation and development of new neurons - also known as neurogenesis.

Psilocybin induces an almost immediate tolerance so dosing is usually done on a rotating schedule. That said, most folks in the microdosing community do not have PMDD. For Hailey, and for me personally, the “PMDD protocol” is more intuitive rather than rigid. For some, taking it during the entire luteal phase works well, but for others sticking to a protocol provides more structure. 

Stamets Stack: 

Lions Mane Mushrooms (fresh or supplement)

Psilocybin Mushrooms (microdose) 

Vitamin B3 (niacin)

4 days on and 3 days off

For example:

Days 1-4 - Stacking

Day 5-7 - Break

Days 8-11 - Stacking

For some with PMDD - including myself - cognitive symptoms can be a real problem. My keys were somehow always lost, my memory was awful and the brain fog kept me confused. Adding Lion’s Mane to the stack certainly doesn’t hurt. After her first two microdoses, Hailey noticed the effects immediately:

 “I am not even kidding you, those first two days, I said to my partner - I feel like I have like a serious brain injury and whatever I just consumed fit into a hole in my brain and made it function again. It was wild and I didn’t expect it to be instantaneous at all. That in particular, hasn’t happened again, it’s much more low-level and beneath the surface. A lot of memories are coming up, thoughts and feelings from my childhood - but it’s working very low and slow. I think it’s letting me feel things that I would never let myself feel, so that’s been really big. And honestly I want to feel those things and I want to unpack whatever it is that’s keeping me stagnant and depressed.”

Pro Tip: For some, microdosing during the luteal phase is used to manage symptoms but it isn’t always well-tolerated. Because of the “surfacing” effect with psilocybin, some prefer to microdose during the follicular phase to prevent or lessen symptoms during the luteal phase. 

“And overall, there’s been a larger trend since I've been doing this over the last 3 months - my symptoms during the luteal phase have gone from two weeks to one week. I talked to my partner about it and asked - "Am I imagining this?!”

Quality of life with PMDD is huge. Suffering from symptoms for even one day is not ok, but two full weeks is straight torture. For Hailey, the benefits from microdosing have been substantial. Finding something that works isn’t always easy and as with any medication or substance, an individual risk analysis should be performed. Before trying psilocybin she went through the same process of researching potential benefits, risks, and side effects as she would have done if she were considering a new prescription medication. 

Big shout out to Hailey for sharing her microdosing story openly and authentically to help others on this journey. Her Poem PMDD, Evicts Me hits close to home and beautifully articulates her PMDD experience:

PMDD, Evicts Me

Who am I?

Which is my truth?

20 years of clawing...

I can feel the moment I slip away.

A heaviness appears.

My jaw tightens, and my spine tingles.

I would scratch my way out of this skin if I could.

I am that little girl, full of shame.

Sadness envelops my bones and joints,

as I move through mud.

I can't remember what it felt like mere minutes ago,

when I looked at my family and felt joy.

I can't provide; I can't be enough.

I am a BURDEN.

I am the embodiment of disappointment.

Practiced affirmations become kindling

for these embers of self-hatred.

An intricate web of contradiction wraps around my ribs;

spreads in and out of organs and sinew.

I feel as though I am fighting with every fiber of my being,

yet I put forth no effort to tip the scale of survival.

Tears well up.

Thoughts intrude.

Trust is an impossibility.

The only thing that helps.

Knowing I will return home again.

-Hailey